First thoughts in the morning

Lately, my first thoughts in the morning goes like these:

• Aww it's so comfy can I still sleep in more
• When I self-answered myself yes it's a wave of happiness
• When I wake up again, thoughts relating to him creeps in

And then I woke up for real. Because I realise it's not reality. 

In bits and pieces, certain thoughts are more enlightening than others, certain thoughts more revealing than others. 

Nobody deserves anyone who ... 

"There is such freedom in just letting go and being - you can never match up to expectations anyway - you can't fit into someone else's screenplay or their character sketch of you - and sometimes you end up being the villian in their movie but it's most important to be the hero of your own story - it's most important that your monologues makes sense to you - let go and enjoy the movie your life is making with you cause it's as epic as you want it to be."

I relate with this a lot. Maybe I feel I ended up being the "villian" 'cause I heard stuffs said about me, which I know is not me. I don't even know how and why. But my conscience is clear and even though I feel like standing up for myself, explaining it to someone whose mind is fixated would be futile. That's the thing i guess. Once the lines of communication are closed, things just go downhill from there because a million misunderstandings, lack of explanations jumbles everything into one big stupid mess. Sometimes I find it really childish. We're no longer kids, you know?