heart strings

It is breaking my heart a little...

But I really think that... if i'm born just a few years earlier, I would have been lucky enough to avoid being caught in this in-between generation, to be able to avoid the generations that came swiftly after. The generations that grew up so westernised, that bring along with it the complications and dilution of what's truly pure and honest and simple. That destroyed .....

Not to say in the present everything is not pure/honest/simple/true etc. I believe and know it's out there, somewhere.

But honestly, I feel like I'm not meant for this generation, and I am stuck as a result.
I'm too late to be part of the older generations. Even though their examples embodied all that I now want, they showed me what truly matter. And what truly matter need not be complicated, need not require a lot of effort.
I'm also too early to fully embrace the younger generations, especially when we grew up having a taste of the older generations' way of life.

It is breaking my heart a lot actually...

Because that could have been my life.
But the time for it has passed and I can never have it ever again.
Not in this life.

*

And that, is really something that I will hold on to and I know it will be my strongest motivation and greatest gift in life. With that alone, I know I'd have led a good life. No matter what shit life brings me.

That would have changed my life so much for the better. I know I'd be a much happier, much more driven, much more courageous, much more fun-loving, much more loving person.

Now, I feel like I stopped living since I was 17.