Hello World.

It feels so good to be able to have some proper rest, to have a break/sleep last longer than 6 hours.

And so last night, which is a Friday, and I managed to reach home earlier than the rest of the week, I had dinner with my family and finally ate home cooked food. Struggling between feeling so exhausted and yet wanting to do things that feed my soul... I have no idea how but I just came across some Princess Hours stuffs and I ended up watching Episode 1 just for fun. 

And boy, all that emotions and nostalgia of my childhood and teenage past came rushing back to me. This came out in 2006 and I remember many people raving about it but that was still before K-Wave hit me. I remember picking it up and getting hooked on it ever since. Even when I watch this again today, this drama reminds me why it has a really special place in my heart because i find myself falling in love with everything about it all over again. Everything that made me appreciate the Korean Drama scene. And it is why it will be my all time favourite Korean Drama. 

It's a drama full of laughter, bittersweet and poignant moments that just gets me. 

It's something I'm very thankful for, and I remember blogging all about it when I was in secondary school (and had all the time in the world to blog and rave about it.)

Everything was brilliant and perfectly put together, from the cinematography and music especially :') Some of your favourite songs will grow out of you somehow, but this drama's OST never will. It grows on me with the years.

OH. I remember why I started watching this again. 

Because during some of the darkest and toughest moments this peak, chancing upon a re-make of the hit song "Perhaps Love" on Spotify gave me so much happiness. 

I guess, it never hurts to return back to something that once gave you so many good memories and hopeful vibes <3

Can't thank this production or what i call, a wonderfully made piece of art, enough. 

to the point I want to save the piano scores of the OST and learn to play it myself soon.

to the point I want to save the manga pages and do some colouring on my own. 

to the point I want to make covers of some of my favourite songs in the world.

lol bless my deprived creative side.

What job allows me to do all that I love?

S1E7

RACHEL: I mean, do you think there are people who go through life never having that kind of... 

ROSS: Probably. But you know, I'll tell you something. Passion is way overrated.  

RACHEL: Yeah right. ROSS: It is. Eventually, it kind of... burns out. But hopefully, what you're left with is trust, and security, and... well, in the case of my ex-wife, lesbianism. So, you know, for all of those people who miss out on that passion... thing, there's all that other good stuff.  

RACHEL: [sigh] OK.  

ROSS: But, um... I don't think that's going to be you.  

RACHEL: You don't.  

ROSS: Uh-uh. See, I see.... big passion in your future.  

RACHEL: Really?  

ROSS: Mmmm.  

RACHEL: You do?

Yeah, can't believe i'm going through my second peak again.

Times like this... I really hate work for robbing away so much from me.
You may say I can choose not to let this happen. I can choose to still prioritise and do what I want.

But I really don't know how to change the hardworking part of me at work that is driven by my desire to do as much within the shortest time possible, so that I can increase the amount of after-work free time I have in my life, to do more of the things that truly matter.

I am still trying to challenge the stereotype that we can't have a life in this industry lol.

Naive or what but it's true I don't have much of a life now again.

And to see my parents age more and more over the years...... while i reach home and become too tired to even say more than 3 sentences to them, or by the time i reach home they're already asleep... just breaks my heart.

There's just too much going on on my plate... and when I'm tired all I want to do is escape...

Need. To. Stop. Putting. My. Wants. Before. Others?

Thank you 2K17! Let me love you, 2018.

2017 - one of the most exhausting but also very beautiful years so far

This is going to be a special year in my memory, because it is the year I am 100% better now (!!!) and I actually start to grow dreams and hopes for the future again.
It's really one of the happiest years to date despite the extreme downs. I'm so glad the positives outweighed the bad by a bit!

*

As I read everyone's reflections about their 2017, I don't know if it's just me, but in general, I felt that 2017 was a positive year for many! Many good things happened for people (friends getting engaged, many more people tying the knot especially in the second half of the year, graduation, people being able to find closures, strength and positivity from tough times). While some have also experienced losses and heartbreaks, somehow people are able to stand strong and find contentment still with their 2K17.  That adds to my happiness for 2017 too!

*

My 2K17 in a nutshell:

• More than expected travelling opportunities- Bangkok - post-peak trip with my parents to in March. I was lucky to be able to get my leave approved in 2016 even though typically we are not allowed to take leaves from Jan - Mar. It was a first trip to treat my parents ever since I became a working adult.
  - UK & Scotland - family holiday to visit my England relatives. One of my highlights in 2017 and longest holiday I've gotten for the year.
  - TASSIE - aussietors trip! The nature and adventures just blew me away, not forgetting the peaceful moments of quiet reflection and learning to live in the moment
  - Phuket x2 - This one's for my work buddies who really made work a hella lot more bearable
• Settling better into work life 
• Learnt to laugh a lot more. Getting better at letting go in general.
• Made conscious effort to care and be with my family more. 
• Lucky enough to experience moments that can made my heart skip a beat again
• Had a lot of honest, good and mind blowing conversations with people who matter
• Met a special human being whom i know changed my life in one way or another
• Laughed a lot more and felt happiness on a level never before because of this special human being
• Felt sadness in the gut and accepted that good things may not always be here to stay for long too because of the same special human being
• Learnt to be strong nonetheless through a different person this time
• Noticed people getting more real with themselves, more real with life, being more authentic and that's beautiful
• Learnt to be courageous to pursue what I want. I had a case of 20 seconds of insane embarrassing courage - one of the proudest moments of myself this year
• Began my spiritual journey to wellness and fitness (from yoga with beryl to gym trials to eventually signing up for my first ever gym membership!!!) - one of the best decisions I've made this year

2018 - ______________________

Here's to...

1. Being more present in 2018
2. To having a healthier and stronger mind, bodaye & soul :-) 
3. Nurturing and taking of relationships with friends and loved ones
4. Continuing to be open minded and having a big big heart
5. Find out what is my gift in this world, in this universe
6. Don't be jaded.
7. Stay positive