lessons from Kelly & Ken's wedding

1. “A good communication is when you speak in such a way that others love to listen to you. Listen in such a way that others love to speak to you.” 
2. Good communication is about helping each other be known, feel known, feel understood (rather than what you say). Not to tell or ask, but so that we can know each other. To know and to be known. 
3. Be quick to listen, slow to speak, be patient with one another. Good relationships do not grow overnight. It takes time to grow, learn. Giving a lot of space and patience for one another. 
4. True love will forgive. A great marriage is not when two perfect individuals come together without suffering. No suffering =/= A great marriage. It’s two imperfect individual, man and woman, they learn to embrace each others’ differences and make the marriage great. You have your weaknesses/shortfalls, challenges, but always remember: The purpose of the marriage is to help each other become better. Overcome evil with good. Do not repay evil with evil. During difficult times, make every effort (not to seek revenge) to build peace and unity in your marriage. Be kind and compassionate to one another and be forgiving to each other. 
5. Good communication + I love you. I am sorry. I forgive you no matter what it takes. 
6. “Love is when once the fight ends, love is still there.” To love someone at their worst and bringing out their best. 
7. Being authentic, truthful, honest with one another 
8. Secret to sustain marriage: stick to what we promised to each other the day we commit to our vows, especially when we are going through difficult times. We must remind what we promise to each other. Bad times, good times, we stay together. 
9. Friendship is important, before and even after marriage. True friends never fail, no matter what it takes. It is good to have a friend and you can enjoy the work you and a friend do together. A true friend is always ready to help in times of need. Remain in touch. Encourage one another. Continue to keep each other updated on your lives. Help each other to remember why you chose each other in the first place 
10. “Most conflicts in marriage that happen is not because of a difference in personality. That’s one of the common excuses. People often say “oh because we have different personalities, we think in different perspectives…” Most conflicts in marriage is a result of bad communication. Relationships take time to learn and grow from each other. 
11. Conflicts in a relationship go beyond bad communication. A lot of times, the real root is actually our selfishness. You never know how selfish you are until you try to love. Selfishness is when one focuses more on their own needs more than the others. To have a good relationship, we must learn to put your partner before you. 
12. Humans’ love alone is not enough, due to our human nature to be selfish. A good relationship takes work and takes time to build. It can’t happen 
13.  Continue to forgive. True love forgives.